The difference if you marry a yorkshire girl!!
Three friends married women from different parts of the world..... The
first man married a Greek girl. He told her that she was to do the
dishes and house cleaning. It took a couple of days, but on the third
day he came home to see a clean house and dishes washed and put
away. ...


The second man married a Thai girl. He gave his wife orders that she
was to do all the cleaning, dishes and the cooking. The first day
he didn ' t see any results but the next day he saw it was better. By the
third day he saw his house was clean, the dishes were done, and there
was a huge dinner on the table.


The third man married a girl from Yorkshire . He ordered her to keep
the house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed, and hot
meals on the table for every meal. The first day he didn ' t see
anything, the second day he didn ' t see anything either but by the third
day, some of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out
of his left eye and his arm was healed enough that he could fix himself
a sandwich and load the dishwasher. He still has some difficulty when
he urinates. Ex 2010 Freelander2 GS-e Diesel manual Silver owner

realspeed wrote:

The difference if you marry a yorkshire girl!!
Three friends married women from different parts of the world..... The
first man married a Greek girl. He told her that she was to do the
dishes and house cleaning. It took a couple of days, but on the third
day he came home to see a clean house and dishes washed and put
away. ...


The second man married a Thai girl. He gave his wife orders that she
was to do all the cleaning, dishes and the cooking. The first day
he didn ' t see any results but the next day he saw it was better. By the
third day he saw his house was clean, the dishes were done, and there
was a huge dinner on the table.


The third man married a girl from Yorkshire . He ordered her to keep
the house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed, and hot
meals on the table for every meal. The first day he didn ' t see
anything, the second day he didn ' t see anything either but by the third
day, some of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out
of his left eye and his arm was healed enough that he could fix himself
a sandwich and load the dishwasher. He still has some difficulty when
he urinates.

that is funny.. proberly true .. but funny My First Fl2 and it is a 2010 GS Auto in Grey
with Nice Leather and the Stereo
even has headphone sockets in the back.
Wish it had a heated screen tho..
Traded in a Fl1 for this.
Got a georgous Black SoftTailed Harley
for when the days get warmer .. Do days ever get warmer in Lancashire?

Stay with it, it is brilliant

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Priceless

I am playing in a "Shadows" band at the moment....I wonder if we could get all our gear in the FL2 ?  John
07 HSE Narvick Black
Land Rover Series One
Triumph Rocket 111 (sadly gone!)

taztastic wrote:

Stay with it, it is brilliant

&feature=share

Taz, like these guys you have way to much time on your hands

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MD away this week, second in command so keeps me off the road and indoors, odd phone call and email, gota pass the time somehow, happy customers are quiet customers

Doreen's story

&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Carlos Tevez returned to England and reported that Roberto Mancini has treated him like a dog," he complained, as he licked his own . He was then driven from the airport with his head out the car window.

A German guy approaches one of the ladies of the night.
'I vish to buy zex vit shoo.'
'OK,' says the girl, 'I'll charge £50 an hour.'
'..ist gutte, but I must varn you, I am a little kinky, ja?'
'No problem,' she replies cautiously, 'I can do a little kinky.'

So off they go to the girl's flat, where the German produces four large bedsprings and a duck caller.
'I vant zat you tie ze springs to each of your Hans und knees.'
The girl finds this most odd, but complies, fastening the springs as he had said, to her hands and knees..
'Now you vill get on your Hans und knees.'
She duly does this, balancing precariously on the springs.

'You vill please to blow zis kwacker as I make love to you.'
She finds it odd, but figures it's harmless (and after all, the guy is paying.)
She finds the zex is fantastic, as she is bounced all over the room by the energetic German, all the time honking on the duck caller.

Her climax is the most sensational that she has ever experienced and it is several minutes before she has enough breath to say,

'Wow!!! That was totally amazing, what do you call that position ?'
'Ah,' says the German .
. .'zat is ze....




wait for it ..........






Four-sprung Duck technique

A 93 year old man is sat on the curb crying, a passerby asks ''what's up''.
The old man replies ''I'm married to a 21 year old Swedish underwear model who wants sex twice before breakfast and lunch, once before tea and then once more just before we go to sleep''.
The passerby replies ''well what's the problem....... why are you crying ?''
And the old man say's '' I've forgotten where I live''

Tada - McP's 2000th post

mcphersonstrut wrote:

A 93 year old man is sat on the curb crying, a passerby asks ''what's up''.
The old man replies ''I'm married to a 21 year old Swedish underwear model who wants sex twice before breakfast and lunch, once before tea and then once more just before we go to sleep''.
The passerby replies ''well what's the problem....... why are you crying ?''
And the old man say's '' I've forgotten where I live''

Tada - McP's 2000th post

after that we really look forward to the next 2000  At work
At home

"I can't always believe facts I read on the web" - Charles Dickens

winner by default of the tractor vs caravan race

How can you tell if your wife is Australian?
:
:
:
:
:
She will have 4x written on her knicker label...

Once upon a time there lived a beautiful Queen with queenly large breasts.

Nick the Dragon Slayer obsessed over the Queen for this reason. He knew that the penalty for his desire would be death should he try to touch them, but he had to try.

One day Nick revealed his secret desire to his colleague, Horatio the Physician, the King's chief doctor. Horatio thought about this and said that he could arrange for Nick to more than satisfy his desire, but it would cost him 1000 gold coins to arrange it.

Without pause, Nick readily agreed to the scheme, and the next day, Horatio made a batch of itching powder and poured a little bit into the Queen's bra while she bathed. Soon after she dressed, the itching commenced and grew intense.

Upon being summoned to the Royal Chambers to address this incident, Horatio informed the King and Queen that only a special saliva, if applied for four hours, would cure this type of itch, and that tests had shown that, among all of the citizens of the kingdom, only the saliva of Nick would work as the antidote to cure the itch.

The King, eager to help his Queen, quickly summoned Nick to their chambers. Horatio then slipped Nick the antidote for the itching powder, which he put into his mouth, and for the next four hours, Nick worked passionately on the Queen's large and magnificent breasts.

The Queen's itching was eventually relieved, and Nick left satisfied and was hailed by both the King and Queen as a hero.

Upon returning to his chamber, Nick found Horatio demanding his payment of 1000 gold coins. With his obsession now satisfied, Nick couldn't have cared less knowing that Horatio could never report this matter to the King and with a laugh told him to get lost.

The next day, Horatio slipped a massive dose of the same itching powder into the King's underwear. The King immediately summoned Nick . . .

The moral of the story - Pay your bills. 2009 GS Auto Zermatt Silver - Sold June 21 after 10 years of ownership

2016 Subaru Outback SE 2.0 diesel SE Premium Lineartronic Sold 2024 after 8 years and 80k miles . Best Car I ever owned !

2023 Toyota Hilux invincible X 2.8 Auto .

chicken george wrote:

after that we really look forward to the next 2000

Great thanks for the comment - I see you've got away with nearly 9000 similar posts to mine

mcphersonstrut wrote:

chicken george wrote:

after that we really look forward to the next 2000

Great thanks for the comment - I see you've got away with nearly 9000 similar posts to mine

Similar that's stretching it a bit.